Ryan Lesner
Apartment 544
60 South Division Avenue
Grand Rapids Michigan 49503

Ryanlesner1982@gmail.com

Hello reader,

My name is Ryan Lesner.
I am a white male with blue eyes and shoulder long jet black hair.
I am not noticeably ugly. But at the same time I am not noticeably handsome either.
I am simply average looking and I often wear a mustache to display that I am a man.

I also do not have any physical limits.
I have access to all my limbs and I can access them as much as I want.
I can walk, jog, run, lift objects and lift other people as well.
I am able to do basic math, drive a car, operate machines, use office technology and use complex phones.

However even with all my skills and education I am unable to maintain my employment.
Every supervisor or manager for every company I have worked for all expressed the same option.
'' You truly are insane. You can not operate like that in the real world.''
This statement normally follows directly after I have responded to a question asked by another employee.

A prime example of this nearly instant firing is when I was employed at Meijers.
I walked in latterly off the street and got a job.
The next day I was paired with an assistant manager to start my training.
Unlucky for me I was paired with a 25 year old goddess that I was so attractive I couldn't
refuse anything she requested of me.
Stack these boxes, Put these pen's on the shelf, Shoot the president.
I simply did whatever she told me to do.
After 20 minutes of stocking items she started talking to me.

It started out as small talk the weather, sports and NEWS worthy items.
I soon ran out of things to talk about she said to her self.

'' This uniform shirt is kind of uncomfortable. I feel like I am wearing a section of carpet.''
She looked at me and asked '' Does this shirt look as uncomfortable as I feel...''
It was a off the cuff sarcastic I hate my uniform type of comment.

I was suppose to say '' Yes you do look uncomfortable. ''
However instead

 I said '' Well considering that the shirt your wearing is a basic cotton shirt it would be comfortable.''

'' If it were the correct size and not one or two sizes to smalls.
It seems to me someone ordered your shirt a size smaller because it would do two things.
 One the smaller size shirt is cheaper and two the smaller size shirt is more fitting.
Which seems to me is what they wanted because your t-shirt is almost skin tight.
I can actually make out ever curve of your attractive body thanks to your uniform.

I was almost afraid and hope full that the produce sprinklers would come on while we were restocking carrots.
Your uniform is so tight I don't know if I should file for sexual harassment or dry fuck you on a stack of duct tape.
I could actually dry fuck you on this stack of duct tape and it would be like I was actually fucking you cause
your uniform is so utterly tight. It is as if you are actually naked. ''

She took a couple of moments to come to grips with what I just said.
When she had a chance to fully process what I had just said to her.
She said '' You would fuck me right here in the rear storage room. ''
I honestly said '' I sure would. I would lick you pussy until you are begging me to fuck you.''
She took my hand and guided me to a employee only restroom.
Once she took off her clothes I did just as I stated.
But as she stood there naked

she said '' You will lick my pussy and not stop until I tell you to stop.''
'' I gotta see if it is actually true. ''

Taking her disbelief as a personal challenge I wanted to prove her wrong.
I actually licked her vagina until she told me to stop.
I recall that I  was licking her clitoris for an hour and 20 minutes.

She was actually trying not to laugh or trying to gasp for air when
 she said '' Please stop. ''
As I was in the middle of an attempt to prove myself as a man to the female assistant manager.
The senior male manager alarmed by the noise used the bathroom doors key and discovers us.
This would have been instant termination.
However I actually kept fucking her even after the door opened.
An upon the managers request to stop fucking his assistant manager.
 I refused to honor his request and with my left foot pushed him out of the bathroom.
Only to then close the bathroom door once again.
Even the assistant manager I was fucking looked shocked by my reaction.
However she soon lost herself to the pleasure of the moment.
I enjoyed myself and so did the assistant manager.
But I soon became tired and my lust full desires soon were full filled.

As I walked into the sales floor I was suddenly face to face with an angry senior manger.
Who at once said '' What the hell do you think you are doing with my daughter? ''
I simply said '' I was having sex with an attractive woman who was wearing a skin tight uniform. ''
'' Her clothes were so utterly tight I couldn't help myself. ''
'' You should of just put a huge sign on her head that said attractive goddess with blinking lights.''
'' I had no choice. I was completely hypnotized by a heart shaped ass.''
The senior manager then said 
 '' You truly are insane. Your totally nuts. You can not operate like that in the real world.''  

I have had 22 different managers tell me I am completely insane.
But it always happens after someone ask me a question about something.
An it is normally an every day normal question that employees ask each other.
Like '' I am buying my girlfriend this shirt. What do you think ''
Or '' Do you think my grand mother would like a blender for Christmas ''
Or '' Would I look stupid if I wear blue jeans with a blue Walmart uniform shirt ''

Oddly enough even stupid questions where I should just say.
'' Yes that shirt would look great on your girlfriend.''
'' Yes your grand mother would love a blender. ''
'' No I do not think a blue shirt with blue pants looks stupid. ''
However I never give such responses because these people want to know what I honestly think.
So I end up saying stuff that nearly traumatized the person asking the question.
When a guy ask me '' What do you think of this shirt ''
I ask '' Who is it for ''
When he responds '' It is for my girlfriend.''
 and produces an attractive image stored on his cell phone.
I have to comment on how attractive she is because I am looking at an attractive image of her.
I then say '' Wow your girlfriend is very attractive. You must be fucking her as much as possible. ''
Which is where the conversation gets weird cause even if his
girlfriend is a sexual goddess they won't be having sex.
Most grown men who are buying clothes for 20 year old women who wear white gold crosses
are either fathers of that female or are guys who are in the middle of a midlife crisis.
Who recently married said woman..
That or the guy is a religious weird O who believes all sex is a sin.    

Even if the mans wife is a sexual goddess who is begging him for an orgasm each day at noon.
She could look him in the eyes and say " put your cock in vagina or I'll finger your ass. "
He will refuse both offers and walk away.
There is no way in hell sex is gonna happen within a year.
 Not even fore play or heavy petting.

Simply because this guy is carrying an official church verified virgin card.
A waiting for marriage virgin who has no sexual desires at all.
A guy who has an attractive woman as his girl friend and has no sexual desires toward her.
A guy who has chosen to go through life in Chasity.
With no connection to his groin. A life with no penis and testicles.
A groin less man wants my advice on what type of shirt to buy his girlfriend.

Since it doesn't matter either way. I normally pick something outrageous and revealing.
Like a tube top that is three sizes to small so cleavage spills out into the V neck.
An it causes every guy who looks at her chest get an instant erection.
   That way so she will get hit on by a guy with a functional dick.
So she won't spend her entire life with contently limp cock poor excuse of a man.
Who only gets semi hard due to the excitement caused by talking about Jesus healing the sick.

Now if your dick gets semi hard or fully erect while your talking about Jesus healing a blind guy.
Then you have some major troubles and need a swift kick in the balls.
I mean even if the blind guy said

'' Jesus I was licking my wives pussy and when I was licking my second wife's vagina.
  A mist like liquid sprayed me in my eyes and I went blind. ''

The idea is not so utterly sexy that you should instantly get an erection.
The only way such an event would make your dick hard is if you find
the idea of a muscle bound guy with a beard dressed in nothing but a blanket sexy.
An if you do find that sexy your clearly are a homosexual and Jesus don't roll that way.

But the entire idea that some people are homosexually attracted to Jesus explains a lot.
Why else would a guy with an attractive girlfriend not want to at least kiss her.
He doesn't want to kiss his attractive girlfriend. He secretly wants to lock lips with Jesus.
Well if he wants to make out with the winner of the Jesus look a like contest.
He can go ahead and do that. While he's being a holly homosexual.
I will be invalidating his attractive 25 year old girl friends virgin card.
After all I am pretty sure she would be begging for an orgasm at that point.
An after about 30 orgasms she would be my future wife.